Opium and Prose

Computer, phone, expletive, phone, doorway, chips, phone.
Shining bluish threads exercise on a brown suede couch
“so, hey…. Is the internet down? Hear that sound?”

Eyes flick up, trying to engage, revealing a distant focus
Halting and weary they resume spasms inside the digital corral.
Earbuds whine a slick pastiche of golden faded sounds
One dangles heartward, strung over a lobe, fastened in canal.

Shorts worn to brown, riding simple socks and crumb from forgotten meals.
Nothing short of time has drowned, the feeling is rather surreal.
Lightly when they start their seeking, all rising from a curious
Tone and sudden mental flailing I give my brain a bone.

Perchance my only reckoning in this vast and electric hail is that
I’ve managed to put off paying the bills and checking through my mail.
When suddenly after hours engaged in vapid frantic glance
I hear the shuffle across the floor of the jabberwocky dance.

This surely was predicted and my heart does skip a beat,
Flinging off my clothes in the sudden baking heat. My torpor is
Complete and naked drums I pound and stroke, the giving is in
the living and it’s a wonder we all don’t choke.

~Apologies to Lewis Carroll~

Making choices without being a dick

There's a lot of talk about what you eat, it's a very polarizing topic apparently. GMO, the levels of organic, forbidden foods, the gluten wormhole, slow-food movement, lactose issues, allergies (real and imagined), vegan, vegetarian, and pescatarian, pills, fads and drinks, locavore, raw and whole, the pickle diet etc, etc, etc,.... ad nauseaum.

On the one side I think it's very important that you know with some certainty what you are consuming, on the other side though it seems to become something close to fanaticism for many. Where a weird sort of fundamental dogma takes root and disallows for any concession. I have too many taste buds in play to limit myself to a strict regimen but I would like to make sure that I consume more things that are born in the open air of the world than in a laboratory.

I love cooking food - all kinds. Good quality meats and fish are so reliable and consistent when being applied to the heat of an open flame. Root vegetables sing and dance when tossed with non-saturated oils in a pan. Nothing beats a biscuit baked in a wood stove using bacon grease. My nose loves to be in the middle of all the savory, sweet and sharp smells it can find. Best spices for it's pleasure are found in the South Asian or Mediterranean regions.

I love heat, the sweat inducing and the heart pumping kinds. It a beautiful thing when a dish of succulent tidbits gets the blood flowing and the endorphin system flashing around the body. I wish I could invite anyone who is reading this over for dinner, I love cooking food for people. In my advanced age there's nothing like an awesome dinner party to cap off a day, especially if I get to cook. My whole family is like that and most times when I go visit them I don't even have to step foot in the kitchen.
D'enjoy!

Go.

Just to clear things up, I am firmly on Team Zombie and not Team Vampire. That may change but I thought I'd clear up any misconceptions straight away.

Today's post is about email, I'm a middle manager who manages to middle about all day answering between 30 - 50 emails. Some are technical some are scary, most are a plea for help. I'm going to take the last sentence of the last 10 emails I got today and string them together, see if you can guess what I do?

go.

I realize that this is quite a ways away, but am wondering the best approach on this.

While that frees up positions, it will take awhile for truly increasing the size of your team. We are all in 100% agreement. No changes submitted. But I am not supportive of doing so, and unless I am mistaken (please point that out) then no action is required until we can look at it next week. We will be by to pick this us today. Individual installs would be cumbersome at best. After they confirmed the warranty status they a sent repair return box. Is there any additional information that I can provide at this time or have you settled things for now? Please let me know if this is an issue.
Thank you and good night!

Datelline: ADHD

Day 29. Cat is losing mind. Blood orange tequila sunrise. Sunday Streets is good for the hood. A firm nap at 3pm. The Exploratorium at the pier. Heat and sweet cheese. Art and food. Dancing on walls.
We've purged so many times that it feels like a short ride to the 'burbs. We wait, for the crazy crier who tells us to move on, but for now we get to live in an amazing place with tons of weirdos. It just takes getting out there and making sure you see each other.

Thanks to every human who gave me the time and the sight and patience to get along for even a day more. Brothers and sisters was a powerful shout once, it made us want to grab and hold the people around us.

It's not midnight yet, it's nice and wet behind the ears, don't let the cynics step on the crest in your jib.

Text Poetry - predictive style

Predictive text time kids! Go ahead and play along if you want.
First, rub your fingers all over the keys, make sure to have word complete turned on.
Enter what your phone decides is a sentence.

Silly time go farm, commence:

Django if TV dog dry UK keno oh eh DMX good braun.
Experiencing overlaying Hedi jangle Jan full mugabe fish.
Doh g fit they 5 Rico I endo provide Jr u m roxy TV be do own HDx
and the classic:
Textbook watch lowly beck luv Cami us to keck ferric DC dirk
I love words of any kind. Books magazines or ingredients lists.
There are so many and you can use whichever of them you want forever!

Fun fact: Your brain is designed to connect a tactile sensation with memory receptors and repetition. If you read something while turning pages you will learn or retain more than 50% better than reading something on a screen.

Then there's always predictive text nerd words no matter what.
Love! Words! Food! Fun! Music!

Objectification of objects

I've been politely asked to stop posting pictures that objectify robots, and I get that. I certainly don't want to contribute to the already unrealistic and ridiculous stereotypes that so many robots struggle with daily. Please accept my apologies.

Here are some of my near-death experiences in chronological order:
I fell in the tub when I was 4 and landed on my head (which yes, does explain a lot) and had some stitches on my chin.

While climbing a telephone pole next to a state route through my small rural town I fell, landed on my back in the road winded, and just at that moment a car was driving by so I tried to lift my head out of the road but my hair was pinned down by the tire.
While jumping from one tree branch to another I almost landed on a sleeping owl which freaked us both out and I fell about 20 feet to the ground.

When exploring some overflow rainwater tunnels underneath Tucson AZ with a few friends and some torches we came darn close to asphyxiation when there wasn't enough oxygen for us and the fire.

When riding shotgun in a 1969 mustang with no seat belts that was doing 95 on a city street we hit a Volkswagen bug with 2 nuns in it as they were making an illegal right turn. No one was seriously hurt.

I fell about 40 feet down a cliff at the end of Campbell Ave in Tucson while free climbing but only received minor cuts.

One time I jumped off the roof of a house into a snowbank and plunged through 15 feet of snow and blacked out for a period of time. Since then I've been told that's how folks suffocate in an avalanche.
Riding helmet-less on my Honda night wing 650 a van ran a stop sign and I t-boned the thing but only sustained minor head injuries. (again, explains some things doesn't it?)

While riding my bike and pulling some friends behind me on roller skates water-skiing style I lost control of the bike because of the centrifugal force of the weight of the people I was pulling and during the course correction went full speed across 6 lanes of heavy traffic unscathed.
Have a great day! May the luck of Panky's Pride be on your side!

iRun

Today's question is: "I have really been enjoying the Rockabye Baby Lullaby versions of Radiohead and Depeche Mode lately. What are your thoughts on adult music reimagined for kids, and would you let your band's music be subject to this treatment?"

Ok this is actually a tough question for me, I remember nearly vomiting the first time I heard (in a dentists office no less) Bowie's 'Spiders From Mars' in synth muzak form. Not too long after that in Vegas I heard a Ramones song re-made the same way so for many years I was very much a purist in the sense that HELL NO! don't mess with my rock. DO NOT get your synthesizer all up in my analog guitar and drums. Of course that was back when folks thought that the video and music cassette and would ruin the movie and music industry, my oh my how far we've come; n'est pa?

I also had a distinct bias against drum machines for many years and while I still prefer analog sounds to digital ones things have changed, the years have mellowed my biases and frankly, my hearing is not what it used to be. Hearing and seeing bands do things like Joy Division songs using plastic toy keyboards and miniature chime pianos, and really kick ass at it, has made me reconsider some of my most rigid stances on what makes a song 'good'. It's all in the eye of the beholder right? The first time I heard Devo's version of the Stones 'Satisfaction' I was instantly captured by the creative brilliance. I know many who might not agree, so yes, I would consider having my music interpreted in a format like this. It's funny though, I've got the site up and I'm checking it out and I have to say the version of 'Space Oddity' is good and fine but the version of 'London Calling' is awful, just so lacking what made the original song amazing.

Oh god - help me lord now I'm looking at the whole catalog and getting a little anxious, oh lord, 'Heroes"?! Lullaby versions of Blur and Rush? I'm starting to shake a bit, feeling sweat form on my brow, oh no no no,...lullaby versions of Kiss, Van Halen and BLACK SABBATH!?!?!?! Excuse me I'm, I've got to,... I might be feeling a touch apoplectic. MEDIC!

Mystery Dork

I'm a huge sucker for anything even remotely resembling the unexplained or mysterious. I want to believe, and get so easily distracted by possibilities of phenomena, spirit incarnations, scary unknowns and generally unbelievable natural events. There's a really seductive quality for me when situations or people converge even on something simple, like how does a guy fall out of an airplane from 20,000 ft and not get squished? It happens though.

I lived in an old New England farmhouse that supposedly had a bullet hole in the entryway ceiling (you could see a small burned looking hole in the wood above) where legend had it that a jilted lover committed suicide in front of his partner. Somehow the story I got out of it was that the jilt-ee's tortured ghost wandered the house bumping things and making a general nuisance of itself.

I used to have a fantasy that I would get to see that ghost and it would take me on a Lion,Witch, Wardrobe type journey. I've discovered since then that using any number of visual or mental aids I can go anywhere I want almost anytime that pleases me. This is so helpful during many of the weekly meetings I attend.

Here's a sample of one of my current favorite optical illusions, it's not a .gif either it just looks like it's moving. Enjoy and take a mind trip today! Your pal, Dave

Goth Story

I was in love with a Goth. There were several really strange chance meetings in the beginning, at my only trip ever to Pier 32 on Geary Blvd, the Woodside Muni station and outside the Transamerica bldg on Montgomery. That last one was when I was wandering away from another disastrous show at The Purple Onion and I saw her from 3 blocks away as if there was a zoom lens in my head. The other people on the street became translucent and the buildings faded and tilt shifted out of my vision. We had a drink at the Hilton and made fun of the suits and stiffs.

Later in the month we met again as planned at the Colma graveyards, riding the BART, her leaving from the East Bay and I from Civic Center. I was too cautious and insecure to get wild in public and she tried to drug me (but we both knew what she wanted and was trying to do). I had a show that night at the Kennel club and went for it anyway. I started laughing so hard at something and practically blacked out and next thing I knew it was cold and windy and I was laying on a statue of a baby with a halo. Fearing that I might have had some part in knocking it over I beat a quick trail out of there and barely got to the show on time.

There was never any phone or addresses exchanged to begin with and we always just said to met up again on such and such a date, usually at the most depressing places, and she would take advantage of me. I might be exaggerating there.

Ended up going to all the graveyards and churches we met at, as randomly as possible for almost a year. Never saw her again.

Straight to (Tech) Hell

Tuesday September 16th - Tech Support Bunker, Silicon Valley desert, concrete bunker #5, where dreams go to die.

Me: Hi this is tech support, Dave speaking, can I help you?
Them: I have a printer that just prints random nonsense and sometimes won’t print at all.

Me: Thanks for calling do you have the make and model of your printer handy?
Them: Yes it’s an HP LaserJet 1356, I’m trying to print wirelessly.
Me: Are you close to the computer you are trying to print from?
Them: No, it’s at home.
Me: Is that where the printer is as well?
Them: No, the printer is here in my office.
Me: Can you throw a rock and hit your house from your open office window?
Them: Ha ha, no I live about an hour’s drive from my office.
Me: (Making clicking noises) Thank you, thank you, can I help you with your issue today?
Them: What? I,.. um could you repeat that?
Me: (Turns on office fan and firmly sticks a pen into the blades) [crriackkkk!] Hello, I’m Dave, I’m Dave, option one is no longer a valid argument. Please press any key to continue. Your satisfaction is our goal, muffle the clamps and sport the calipers. Thank you, thank you, have I solved your issue?
Them: What?! Wait, hello? Oh wow,… [muffled] I think the tech support line is broken. Are you real? Hello who is this? Can you hear me?!
Me: (sound of snapping a keyboard in half) Thank youthank you thankyou, issue is resolved measure have tried turning it off and on? Plastic tab on the back serial number matches your employee ID…… halt code execute….. critical path exception please reboot master boot record….
Them: [muffled] Stupid IT robot! You suck! (click)
Me: LUNCH TIME!

Robot Questions

Today's question:
"How would your life be different if the following people were robots: your boss, your spouse, your son?"

So many wonderful possibilities here, I love robots and am very handy with machines if they need a fixin'. So, if my Boss was a robot he would certainly be more logical and therefore would be susceptible to the "Liar's Paradox" whereby I could shut him down with an easy philosophical quandary, put my consciousness into his robot body and take over THE WORLD MUah ha ha ha ha ha!!!!!!!!

If my Son was a robot he would be so very grateful that I was kind enough to keep him in a small closet under the stairs and feed him magnetic filing scraps, so he could have enough energy to clean the house, wash my clothes and massage my bunions. (A strange word really, so close to onions, but not at all close.) Then I would instruct him to use his robot super powers to help me take over THE WORLD MUAH ha ha ha ha ha!!!!

If my spouse was a robot,.... hmmmm if my spouse were a robot I would be sad, I think. The upshot would be an indestructible and awesome unicorn robot who could answer any question and always give me a ride home from the party. The far larger downside would be me with bruised lips and metal splinters in my hands trying to make out and get to 2nd base, so instead I'd use the super powerful unicorn robot brain to help me bio-dinetically engineer an organic Michelina spouse with pink hair and a crazy good sense of humor like I'm used to and together all 3 of us would then take over THE WORLD MUAH ha ha ha ha ha!!

Fire

On it's own the literal chemical reaction has little smell, you can't touch it (well, you can't snuggle with it let's say) and it has been a fascination of mine my entire life. I melted green army men in my closet, stole my parents lighter to heat up a nail and make laser gun wounds in star wars figures, lit a mattress abandoned in the alley on fire where it smoldered for days under a gas meter, sent candles suspended by helium balloons in the air, made torches out of broom sticks and t-shirts, used any flammable aerosol to 'season' my clothes as part of making them look punk, torched countless crosswalk christmas trees tossed out on the street after the new year and performed many experiments on my siblings toys.

We use many expressions culturally based on our mutual admiration of combustion and flames, "she was on fire", "we burned them bad", "we torched the other team", "scorched earth policy" as well as "burned my bridges", "flamed me for saying that" and "I was blazed".
So, good and bad we have all had some kind of relationship with fire probably going back to primitive times.

You're probably thinking 'this is going to end in tragedy' but you'd be incorrect, I've never hurt any living thing or destroyed property (severely). I'm actually advocating the use of (controlled) fire and burning because my experience with it has been so cathartic and often exhilarating. I love a ritual, and when it came time to shred some documents (bills, hate mail, divorce decree, collection notifications, a formal reprimand and anything from the government) I scooped them all up and put them in my "Simpson's 10th anniversary" limited edition weber grill and lit those puppies up! It was so freeing to watch all those formerly important paperworks flame up and crisp to a rich black ashy color. Man!

As good as a few months in therapy and a ton cheaper.
So give it a try, find a nice safe place outdoors, pull out some of those items you've kept for no other reason than to torture yourself over your past transgressions, and burn baby burn. D'Enjoy!

Creationism Pank style

Shouldn’t there be a word for that moment – when you walk into a club or show and you’re certain it is where you are supposed to be, taste something incredible and realize how it just shaped your life or saw a massive scene unfold that you knew you would never forget. Love words! And it seems like there are a boatload of romance languages that get it and have a word or phrase for these things. Something better than ‘killer’ ‘awesome’ or ‘badass’ to lend weight to uppermost points that inform your psyche or soul.

In a science class once the Teacher made us all do an exercise where we put hands into a box that had a variety of objects plastic wrapped and sealed and we had to guess what they were. Not sure I remember how well I did at it but it was a revelation at the end for me, there was one box we hadn’t used up on the desk and as I asked “what’sinthisbox?!” I shoved my hand through the hole. My hand came out faster than it went in covered with dark red gelatinous muck, and she turned to me and smiled as she said “the heart of a pig”.

That’s when I needed a word, not the expletive I used to describe my shocking, humbling and revelatory experience that got me a week of detention. A word that would have let everyone know I wasn’t angry but just discovered a few important life lessons all at once and I knew it.

1. Don’t stick your uninvited hand into a strange box.
2. Adults may not have your best interest in mind at all times.
3. There may never be another box so you’d better stick your hand in there.
4. I could pull this stunt all over town and probably not get arrested.

So if you’ve got some suggestions send those in, let’s get some more words in the mix around here. How about shartism, or mullniferious?

Wicked Fall Thoughts

Something Wicked This Way Comes is always in my thoughts this time of year.
Even the crazy time change where we lose an hour seems to be something brought about by the dark carnival, and I imagine Ray Bradbury chuckled a little to himself in 1966 when Daylight Savings became a law for most of the 50 states. Spin around forward and you get older but spin around backwards,.... who knows what could happen.

Fall seems to be the most conflicted of seasons depending on where you're at in your life, it's a sensational time for watching nature shake herself and change, ultimately hibernating or withering away, but also to harvest and gather the bounty of summers harvest and stock up for the cold. The end of summer is finalized for many children by the start of school, so there's that, but as adults with children most of us can't friggin wait!

The beginning of the 'holiday' season is also something I dread about Fall but Halloween offsets that a bit with it's pure impulses of fright, candy and rich display creativity. Music and theater often begin new tours and opportunities to explore and participate in revelry abound in some of the most unexpected places. One of my favorite combinations of feelings are the creepy/nostalgic things, like how I feel when I read the aforementioned Bradbury book, or some Lovecraft stories on a windy night that gets dark so quickly and the sun seems to race it's way below the horizon. Light a candle and let's observe the summer's frolic and fun slip quietly into a dreamy nightshade gaze together. Because if any book ever made it clear that going back to being young, (or getting old before your time) was a mistake, it was that book for me.

Unmarvel

You marvel at the images
In the center of your screen
Baking pieces of loss
Putting them far inside
Fortunate from folly...
Preying on all spirits
It brings a special broth
It means to leave you dry

When you hold that sickness close
Springs of toxin flow right by
Inching and squirming rivulets
Parching your soul and mind
And what it takes is so minuscule
Where it starts is so very small
Leaps are not needed to fly
Just step one foot away from the hole
Echoing some standard past
Dropping like the frail
Pouring into the pail
Surprisingly seldom snapped
All the way to the back
Marching you into the sink
Impossible to almost get out
Hailing the sun back into your camp
Oh yeah the soul sucking sound
Step away from the soft cliff now
Step off when you mind the gap
We’ve all had that stumble down
We know where it is you’re at
Marked like prosperous damsels
Melted like drowning the fat
It could make lynching a savoir
Might be a sharp quick boost is best

What would Jim Do?

Today's question (on below youtube video): "Would Jim approve of this? Should he? Such an artist of the most analog, live action form?? But I cant stop grooving"
YEAH! and a notha HELL YEAH! I can't pretend to know Jim Henson at all but I feel like he would approve of this tribute to the great MCA and that you found it on your birthday and it made you happy. I think he would also approve of you posting from your partners FB account by accident or not and so do I. What ever you do do not stop grooving, for any reason ever.

Grooving is what keeps the birds and bees doin it, keeps the flowers and the trees movin it and gets the party from a song to a bomb. I love that it's the Chef and Animal and Beeker, seems to me those are darn good reps for the Beasties. 

Enjoy this day like crazy and then get up tomorrow and do it again, you've got mountains to move and your love can make it happen. I will testify to the power of the muppets, rock and roll and laughter with no shame whatsoever. Let's try to get that started in the most unlikely places; you at the DMV? Start a sing a long! You stuck in Jury duty? Start humming the theme to the Good the Bad and the Ugly. They can't arrest you for humming right? I love you!

The King is dead

Elvis Presley died on my birthday and we've been locked in mortal combat ever since, I never fail to give a nod to the king however he is not my king. Madonna and I share a birthday, and I think that's just peachy. When I was in Wales I got mistaken for one of the locals more than a few times, but I couldn't understand a word and they knew their mistake as soon as I uttered a syllable. The view from the back porch is of a huge retirement apartment complex, the only time all the curtains are pulled back from the windows is when the apartment is vacant. My bones feel a bit more flexible today for no apparent reason. My permanent adult quandary is that I'm not a fan of shaving but a beard is too itchy. The only time I adore driving through the suburbs is late at night. Fires are burning a couple hundred miles north and when the wind blows the right way you can definitely smell smoke. The first time I drank to get drunk it was jim beam and I still can't stand the smell of that stuff. Something about a red sparkly drum set makes me feel like I'm falling in love, butterflies and squishy brain kind of stuff. If you need to exercise some angst take a trip to the ocean and yell at the incoming tide, works for me every time. Night night.

Paperbacks

A few years ago before the internet there used to be shelves and shelves of cheap paperback books everywhere. I would spend hours (really) just picking through them and looking at the covers. The Sci-Fi and mystery ones were my favorites for sure because of the fantastical images on the jackets. Both my parents plowed through these kinds of books once and there'd be a stack on the basement steps and on any horizontal surface out of sight in the garage or attic. I learned a lot about how men and women thought of each other and what being an adult might mean. I got to think about all kinds of strange issues and worlds from ridiculous and amazing imaginations.

Animal Languages

Animal Languages! I believe! We've had a dee-oh-gee for a couple years now and it's been a wonderment. If you had asked me a few years back "do animals have anything resembling language?" I would've recited what I've read and heard from scientific types who operate in mostly literal worlds of measurement, which is 'no, animals don't have the ability to communicate complex or abstract ideas or feelings; therefore they do not have what humans call language.' At this point it's really tough to qualify what language is but I can tell you that when I come home or into a room and Lou is sitting in the sun he gives me a lazy 'what's up' nod, I'm positive.

If you watch enough of those animals clips on you tube you can also see a pattern emerge especially among mama and baby animals where it's obvious they are not only communicating but transferring authentic and relatively complicated feelings or thoughts. Just the other day Michelina taught a young pup how to get down some stairs and it worked despite the fact that the little fuzz ball couldn't even see beyond the horizon of the step she was on. It gives me courage and hope that this kind of conveyance between animals is not completely measurable in terms we can plot and chart to the millionth decimal, these are some of the natural connections that exist because they can.

My Internet Phone

The internet on a mobile phone is like a bar of soap used for so long that it has become thin and pliable, almost translucent in places. I got confused and tried to wash myself with my phone the other day but instead of feeling clean it left me feeling overexposed and giddy. I held them both up and compared, analyzed the purpose and intent and realized that the soap was much more valuable in a specific way. The immense wonder of being able to absorb millions of bits of data through a lens the size of a bar of soap stands as an achievement of epic proportions but the shape, the shape was the thing that struck me.

A sponge, tin of mints, a cassette, a wallet, a deck of cards, and the aforementioned soap and phone share a shape that lends itself to a personalized interaction. Everything but the phone has specific expected results, a use that can be measured by ability or effect. That phone has bridged the gap though; it’s brought a new and immense range of information, instruction and distraction. Although mostly benign there is potential for conveyance of terrible or wonderful information, questions answered and directions given as well as a dark harvest of so many voices that demand attention, especially in the dreary undertow of the comments sections.

I guess if I had to choose it would probably be the soap or the deck of cards, and really if I needed to convey some information the soap can be used to make words or pictures and the cards can create the same kinds of magical illusions and deliberate trickery that the internet brings you on the phone. Maybe they’re not that dissimilar after all.
  

Love

Hi! You're important and valuable! You've got things to do and say and think! It's not too late. Love and magic are real. I'm paraphrasing the incredible Matthew Silver here but his words match my own thoughts. Sometimes you see or hear or feel something so inspiring that explanations are unnecessary.

Time not mine

Even a broken clock is right twice a day, unless you remember time is a social construct of human design, given importance so to mask our fear of the perpetual unknown and one of many authoritative boundaries that reinforces our desire to be harnessed. Or - it makes it easier to meet up for coffee.

I managed to escape the dependance of needing a watch or time and alarms, not sure why, but even though I've almost always worked from early mornings to late afternoon if I tell myself to wake up at 6am I always wake up within a few minutes without a problem. When I had an alarm in High School I'd always wake up about 12 minutes before the alarm went off, then curse myself because I could have had more sleep. I also routinely forget how old I am, not as in "oh I'm turning 25 again.." but more like I think I'm over 40 now,.... and I have to count on my fingers to figure it out. 

The reaction I get from most folks after I tell them this usually breaks two ways: one is that I get a lecture about not taking life seriously and that's why you... (insert some description of what isn't considered successful here) - the other is: Yeah I wish I could be a free spirit like that, but I've got to.... (insert some martyr-ish claptrap about how demands of others/work/life have them trapped). No biggie, it is what it is and I was raised by hippie wolves so I can howl and dance around the fire as well as have a perfect attendance record no matter how late I stayed up watching Blade Runner for the thousandth time. You learn, you live.

The Home Stretch.

A single black spot of india ink on a crisp white page could be seen as many things: sometimes I see a slightly anachronistic test developed by a guy who thought spots looked like stuff and so should you, it might also be a deep portal to somewhere else but too small for you to fit through, and sometimes a spot of the darkest black ink on a crisp white page can really only be appreciated if you are very very small.

I have learned that if there are too many black spots, it's just a mess. That's what I've been doing for the last 45 days in a row usually between 1 - 5 PM PST for 48 minutes at a time; making a big big mess. I haven't been posting any links, no politics or topical missives, and trying my best to stay away from controversy. I've clicked the 'like' button over 1200 times now (you can find out if you want) and found out a little more about some of the people who are posting things that I have known/know/virtually stalk. 

I made a foolish proclamation on August 16th, a sort of dare to myself, that I would post for 48 straight days in a row, each day remaining on FB for no more or less than 48 minutes. Thoughtlessly I started dropping black ink spots all over the internets, at first is was kind of neat, they looked all interesting and arty when there was just a few. Now looking back it's a big mess of black dots all over a virtual page. Lucky for me I have the attention span and memory capacity of a hummingbird. Every day is a new beginning, and I feel blessed by my....., um,... oh well.
Cheers!

The Confession

Your life is your own, it fits you like your skin! So for any of you keeping score out there you might've noticed a few redundancies in these posts. A few words that were intentionally dropped in for no real reason but it was deliberate:
Bunions
Teabags
Humming (bird)
Irish Whiskey
Robots 

The pictures I've used are obviously not ones I've taken or drawn (mostly) and have been harvested by me over the last 10 years or so back when I saw the internet and all the content in it's gaping maw as a giant pile of "free". Those viewpoints have changed for sure, and if I could credit the pictures to people I would. I used to take music all the time from other peoples digital libraries, those who would foolishly share their music folder on the corporate or home network would unknowingly give me a digital copy of all of it. Not only did I realize this was creepy and wrong, but I wound up with some staggeringly bad rap and pop music.

Nerd.

Now I'm of a different kind of mind - even digital data (despite having no physical presence or value) deserves the respect that stuff I can lick and touch and smell does because someone did something to make it. I feel the same way about a strangers random smile or being given the bird, or a whiff of jasmine or 2 stroke exhaust on my walk to work. These are all things I can't hold or touch or probably even remember next week but mean something and have value.

Fun.

I like to hug, hugging is good and I've been teased and made fun of for it by many.
Once I was on a date years ago and after a great night of dinner and conversation we were about to go our separate ways and I tried to hug her. She blocked me and said "Oh you're one of those,..." and I laughed nervously and said "you don't know what you're missing" which totally creeped her out and we never spoke again. But I wasn't being weirdly boastful about my manhood, I was just trying to let her know that a good solid hug is so valuable at the right time. It felt like the right time to me.

Dumb.

Thanks for everything, I can say for sure that any of you who have been encouraging or commenting or supportive of this weird and silly experiment have definitely played a part in my life. A life that is all the better for your part.

The Conclusion

48 consecutive posts that I spun from the thick web of my noodle, marking the completion of this project. I'm so excited I actually finished! Let's face it there was a pretty high probability that I was going to get distracted by other projects, food, music, making out, hijinks or any (SQUIRREL!) number of things. I'm really honored that you might have stopped by to check out the ramblings, which I admit never had a clear direction but somehow wound around to some funny and, maybe, interesting glimpses into connections we can have just being authentic dorks on the internet.

Listen, if you ever want to stop by and visit I'm game, I'll cook up some Panky's Pride and we can listen to the windows rattle as the Muni bus whines and chugs on up the McAllister hill. I have a cat and a dog too, so you know, Allergy Alert! Or write me a letter or postcard, I promise I'll send something back. 1032 steiner APt F sf CA 94115. Getting mail is fun, just don't send me anything that requires postage, my buzzer is broken and the SF USPS is a bit sketchy these days.

The best thing of all is that I've come full circle in a way, I used to curate a few secret lives, nothing too dangerous or illegal, but things I did on my own because I wanted to experience them or just have the world and all it's spontaneous, random and thrilling possibilities as my canvas. Climbing into buildings and spray painting stencils and setting up the drums on the edge of a cliff so I could play for the gulls kind of stuff. It wasn't that I was embarrassed or intentionally excluding anyone, it was more about feeling a moment unclouded by words, unfettered by viewpoints except my own.

Now I've just finished a Facebook residency where I've curated my thoughts and without much of a plan or purpose decided to throw them out there to see where they would take me. Being a huge skeptic of social media made this all the more of a challenge but you all have shown me something I never expected, that sharing is also unique, that the interaction even in this format is unpredictable; that words are important and we are connected if we want to be.

Thanks. Hopefully we will randomly, spontaneously meet up somewhere soon and laugh it off. Be well - XOXO